He kept the humans he created as slaves without any creature comforts. One day through a hole in the clouds someone noticed a place of beauty below — with birds and butterflies and lush vegetation.

So an escape committee was formed and a rope made. The fattest woman available was used to anchor the rope from the top as the humans crept through the hole and slid down the rope.

Being last and not too bright, the fat lady got stuck in the hole and plugged it up tight. She was stuck fast with her head in the clouds and her feet dangling down towards Earth. This left her in a very awkward position in many ways.

Kononatoo, having discovered where they were, was quite pissed at losing his little helpers. As a punishment, he pledged never to let any human back into Heaven, no matter how hard they prayed. At first life on Earth was not as easy as it seemed — until the humans discovered sex. Then there was no stopping them.

We do hope Kononatoo has installed a dishwasher as we don’t know what happened to the fat woman.

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Article last revised on May 19, 2019 by Rowan Allen.
Editors: Peter J. Allen, Chas Saunders

References: Coming soon.

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