The prototype Homo Dirtius was constructed from wet mud by Ea the Creative Water God. That gives you some idea how creative he was.

Adapa’s story reveals a valuable lesson: It is not a good idea to tear the wings off a Wind God. You may think you have reasonable cause if, while out for a day’s sailing (your brand new hobby) on the Euphrates River, Shutu, the aforesaid Wind God, blows you all over the place and you come close to sinking. But honestly, it’s not worth it.

Adapa’s display of river rage stopped Shutu’s antics and he was very cross. Despite having the ability to grow new wings almost instantly, he brought charges and the case went to the Minor Lawsuits Court run by Anu the God of Many Parts.

When the summons came, Adapa went to his dad for advice. Ea told him to dress sensibly and avoid any Heavenly food or drink. This was unfortunate advice, as the cuisine on offer came from the Kitchens of Immortality. If he had sneaked a doggy-bag of goodies back to Earth, humans could have avoided death.

Anyway, Adapa got off with a caution and a bout of community service. He was required to serve as a sage, teaching mortals how wise and wonderful the Gods were, and also explaining to them how to conduct themselves as decent human beings. Which largely consisted of warnings not to go sailing when that asswipe Shutu was wafting about.

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Article last revised on September 26, 2018 by Rowan Allen.
Editors: Peter J. Allen, Chas Saunders

References: Coming soon.

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